Here are some quick facts that you need to know in order to make real conversation this week:
One: Gen. David Petraeus, (yes, that Petraeus) stepped down from his position as director of the CIA on Friday.
Two: He resigned, rather abruptly, due to an extramarital affair that was discovered by an FBI probe.
Three: His affair was with one of the people writing his biography, Paula Broadwell.
Four: His resignation came about a week or so before a trial before Congress about the terrorist attack in Benghazi, Libya.
Five: The title of his biography is “All In.”
Twas November the seventh, day after elections,
America was represented, all of the sections!
The votes had been cast in the system with care
In hopes that Obama soon would be there.
The children were nestled all snug in their classes,
While visions of binders scared all the lasses.
And mom in her apron, and I in my suit
Had just settled down to look at our Halloween loot.
When out on North Lawn, there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my desk to see what was the matter.
Away to the window, I threw open the blinds
To see tons of people standing in lines!
First Sandy stole gas from the Jersey Shore,
Then people who voted found it quite a chore.
When, what to my wondering ears should appear,
Tons of Americans who gave quite a cheer!
They were led by Obama, jumpin’ and jivin’,
Next to him smiling sat good ol’ Joe Biden.
Led by two eagles, and that cute dog Bo,
On all their shirts was a big, giant ‘O.’
Away they all walked, headed north to Washington
Where they knew they wouldn’t be greeted with stones.
So up to D.C., they all took a walk,
To hard work or a challenge, they did not balk.
From health care to human rights, Obama took a stand.
For that we’re very grateful — give him a hand!
Sasha and Malia must both be so proud;
If he was our dad, we’d announce it aloud!
From Twitter to Facebook, the youth won the vote.
We earned it, dear reader, take a moment to gloat.
No need to be scared of the almost nightmare
Of the man who’s a robot that dyes its hair.
We’re saved from the possible Romney curse;
Obama is better and definitely not worse.
He’ll give us better Pell grants and health care to boot,
He’ll provide us with hurricane supplies, so we don’t have to loot.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to work,
And filed all the bills, then turned with a jerk.
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the White House chimney he rose!
He sprang to Air Force One, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew without even launching a missile.
But we heard him exclaim before they had left,
“Many thanks, all you young people! Especially UF!”
Here’s a problem with Mitt Romney: He sees people as numbers and commodities.
He said during the debate this week that he ran businesses for about 25 years — that either means he’s good at running businesses, or he’s good at starting and closing businesses.
Either way, he might be good at simply looking at numbers.
Romney is trying to claim credit for a women’s group. What else is new?
We love a good viral video.
Cat sitting on a bench? Classic.
Compilation of dudes trying to extreme skateboard or bike ride? Always awesome.
The latest video taking the Internet by storm comes from El Paso County in Colorado.
Someone in a Safeway recorded a video on her cellphone when she noticed something funny about a volunteer who was registering voters outside of the store. She saw that the volunteer had begun asking people which presidential candidate they would vote for before offering to register them to vote.
“Mom, why doesn’t anybody like me?” asks a teenage daughter on any sitcom ever.
“Well, sweetie,” says the mother as she sits them both on the probably beige couch, “maybe because you’ve been trying so hard lately. You don’t normally wear these clothes or such heavy makeup, do you?”
“No, I guess not,” says the daughter. “I just wanted to be like the popular girls in school. They always get all the attention!”
“Now, you listen to me. All those other kids? They don’t know what they’re missing out on,” says the mother. “Think about all your friends who like you just the way you are.”
Tune into a family sitcom, and I guarantee you will catch that scene at some point. It’s the job of sitcoms to portray everyday struggles and to teach us how to deal with them.
Did you know it is the year 2012?
Stacey Pritchard doesn’t seem to understand what that means.
Last week on “Anderson Cooper 360,” journalist extraordinaire Anderson Cooper interviewed people who had opinions regarding Pastor Charles Worley’s outrageous remarks about homosexuality.
Worley said that we need to “build a great, big, large fence 50 or 100 miles long.”